Why Single Mothers Need To Take A Time Out

Despite worries of single parents being a responsible parents, for the most part they see their children as a blessings. Children come with heart warming affection and love. However, along with this love sometimes comes frustration as a parent. Many are confused and feel ashamed for feeling bad about their children. This can be a difficult situation. Depression might happen due to frustration of financial and social worries, or crying and unruly children (source). This is normal, what is abnormal is for these mothers not to realize life does not stop once you become a parent, nor does it halt as a single parent especially a mother.

It takes a lot of mental preparation but the beauty in it all is that life does not have to stop when children are around. Single mothers can enjoy all the luxuries and leisure activities that single fathers enjoy and couples of children as well.

Why address this to women? Women have yet to understand the concept of striving to be the perfect parent, and that there is not such thing. Many single mothers will completely abandoned everything in their life that does not have anything to do with their children in order to gain fulfillment of being the ideal mother. There is nothing wrong with loving your children, but there is no reason that children should have to suffer a mother’s pity and anxiety because they feel like they have to be shut off from the rest of the world. Women should remember there is no such thing as being perfect and your children do not want see you every waking minute of the day. Children enjoy entertainment and interaction with other children, and as an adult you cannot always give them that. Taking them to daycares, preschools and other leisure activities such as dancing, swimming or placing them on sporting teams will free up more time for you to enjoy yourself.

Another thing for single mothers to realize is that as children get older they want more freedom. They tend to want to spend more time with their friends than be around you. It is a good idea to have a life before this period and after to achieve a senses of self.

Single mothers should take advantage of these opportunities and take time out for themselves. Single mothers need to understand that they will drive themselves absolutely crazy if they do not find the time to relax, date or simply have fun while away from the children. Taking time out for yourself as a single mother will alleviate the woes and worries of being a single parent and virtually no life except as a parent. After all children admire their parents more about the experiences and challenges they face in connection to the outside world than a women who is with their children all the time crying, stressed out and constantly worried about issues in front of their children.

Should Single Mothers Date?

Is there any reason that a single mom shouldn’t date? Absolutely not! Single mothers should be out in the world enjoying the experiences of dating just like everyone else.
Unfortunately, some may have a different opinion.

In a supermarket the other day a woman was talking to a friend and said that her daughter was having a difficult time dating and couldn’t seem to find the right man. Mother-dearest suggested that her single-mom daughter not date until the children were “older”. Although “older” was never defined, it was taken to be adulthood.

Maybe the men aren’t the problem, but the way the single mother is handling her dates.

In many cases, single parents who’ve been out of the dating game for a while have forgotten some of the rules. All they need for a successful date is a refresher course on dating. These few bits of dating advice will help.

Clothing should be appropriate for the date:

Dress to be with adults, not children.
Wear something casual, but not provocative.
What you wear should be appropriate for where you’re going.
Stay away from anything with language or graphics that can be offensive.

Hint: if you’re not comfortable going to church in it, put it back.

Perfumes are to be used in moderation:

Don’t use your favourite perfume to excess.
Use a dab, not a splash.

Hint: Perfumes are to entice, not overwhelm.

Jewellery is an accent, not a statement:

Bling is nice, but you don’t have to wear it all at once.
Know the difference between elegant and garish.

Hint: If your date needs sunglasses for the glare, it’s too much.

Fragrances other than your perfume:

Be aware of odors that aren’t your perfume.
Don’t overdo the deodorant. The mix with your perfume could be over-powering.
Breath mints are mandatory.
Cigarette smoke on your breath or clothing is unpleasant to a non-smoker.

Hint: Always wear freshly laundered clothes.

Timing is important:

Be considerate, be on time.
Make sure your busy schedule leaves enough time to get ready.
Phone if you’re running late, and the earlier the better.
If you’re being picked up – be ready and waiting.
If you’re meeting your date, it’s better to arrive early.

Hint: Dates shouldn’t be kept waiting more than 5 minutes

Emergency situations have to be planned for:

Make sure you have enough money to get yourself back home.
Don’t assume that your date is going to pay for everything.
Take your cell phone, or borrow one.

Hint: Plan like you’ll have to pay for everything.

Conversation is the key to a good date:

Keep it light.
Don’t talk about kids unless your date brings it up.
Previous lovers, bad marriages and family problems are out.
Baby talk may be cute, but has no place on a dinner date.
Give your date a chance to be part of the conversation.
Don’t let the conversation turn to silence.

Hint: Make a list of things to talk about before you leave home.

Fun is what a date is all about:

Don’t worry about the kids and start calling them every ten minutes.
Limit your drinking – slurred words and falling off the chair aren’t good things.
Crude innuendos and course language are for the gutter, not a date.

Hint: Relax and enjoy yourself

Ending the date:

If it’s your first date, end it at the door.
Make it another time to meet your kids, don’t rush things.
A Kiss on the cheek is appropriate.
Anything more will be dictated by your feelings.

Hint: From here on out, you’re on your own!

This date is your time to have some fun and adult conversation, so enjoy it.